Meeting in the Middle When Parenting Ideas Conflict
Our children are some of the most important people in our lives, and we often feel passionate about the decisions we have made for them. When you have pored over decisions involving your children, the most difficult thing is to compromise with another parent.
Whether you are married to your child’s other parent, co-parenting after a divorce, or in a set of completely different circumstances, these tips can help you work together in the best interest of your children regarding any decision that needs to be made.
Listen with Open Ears
You and your spouse or ex may be opposites in almost every area. However, you likely both care deeply about your child and can find some common ground because of this.
Be committed to listening to the other parent, and truly listen to what they have to say about the situation. They may bring a complementary perspective to your way of thinking.
Consider What You Have in Common
When you are butting heads about parenting decisions, you need to take a step back and give yourselves both room to breathe. Consider what you have in common with your child’s other parent.
You both have the responsibility for your child and a love for them that runs deeply. Think about these similarities and dwell on them rather than your differences.
Focus on Your Child’s Best Interest
No matter how different you and your child’s other parent are, neither of you is the focus. Choose to focus on your child and only your child. Forget past hurts, stop bickering, and choose to keep your child’s interests foremost.
Leave Personal Issues Out of It
Perhaps your partner has made you angry recently, or maybe some second-hand gossip that started with your ex has been made known to you.
Forget about these things because they will only impede making an unbiased decision for your child. Leave your issues at the door and refuse to entertain any thoughts that deviate from your primary purpose in the conversation.
Figure Out a System by Which to Make Decisions
It will be a long road if two opposite personalities try to agree on every single decision involved in the upbringing of a child. Perhaps you could take turns deciding after each discussion, or maybe a particular parent could be assigned to a certain area of the child’s life that they are knowledgeable about.
Take into consideration your and the other parent’s strong points. Maybe one of you could be the key decision-maker in areas of health, and one is better with issues that may arise at school.
Discuss with a Neutral Third Party
When you feel like your child’s other parent drives you crazy, call a friend who gives expert advice and is not involved in the situation. Ask what she thinks about the situation and see any truth in what the other parent is saying.
Sometimes it isn’t easy to acknowledge a good idea for someone who irritates us. An outside party can help us sift the good ideas from the bad.
Deciding as a team doesn’t mean we should compromise what we feel is right. It does, however, mean that we must sometimes swallow our pride and see another perspective. These tips will help you keep your focus and work together in your child’s best interest for whatever issue may arise.
Meeting in the Middle When Parenting Ideas Conflict
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